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Updated: Feb 26, 2020

Yep, after two and a half years of living in Texas, we're packing it up and moving back to Maine. So if you're wondering why I started a blog and then disappeared for two weeks, that's why! We've got two months to sell our house in Texas, find a house in Maine and move our family of five across the country so my husband can start his job in March. Prepping my house for sale and stalking Maine real estate while running a business and managing three kids' activities has proved to be all consuming. I sat down to write many times but couldn't get the words to come together. So instead of suppressing what I'm experiencing to write about wellness, I'm going to use my writing time to share how I'm processing it all.

While I'm so excited to get back to nature, family and close friends, I'm so sad to leave all of the wonderful friends we've made here. It makes me sick when I think about not seeing some of these incredible people again. Some of the best moments of my life, from cheering on our kiddos, to dancing on tables and crushing killer workouts were with these ladies. And as my heart is aching over my losses, my littles are melting down about missing their friends and school. Today my middle son went so far as to ask if he could stay here with another family. Sob! I know my husband and I are doing what's right for our family long term, but for now it flipping sucks.

In order to support each other as we navigate through this transition, we've decided to try to balance all of the negative with positive. For example, if someone (me) says on a seventy degree day in January: "I'm going to miss this mild winter weather", someone else might say "Yes, me too. But this time next year we'll get to play in the snow!" This simple activity has been incredibly helpful in getting the kids excited about the move. I recently posted a quote on my Instagram Story from @commandinglife that states: "I am never losing anyone or anything because the Universe is always replacing it with more." This is not to say that people are replaceable, but instead that there are more friendships, more opportunities and more blessings to look forward to. I'll cling to this affirmation to see myself and my kids through this time.

So yeah, change is hard and change is beautiful. Change allows us to appreciate what we have, to let got of what's not serving us and to welcome the new. Change allows us to evolve and to identify who we are and what we value. My move to Texas was a major change for my family. And despite the pain it's causing right now, I would do it all over again. Living here allowed me to get to know myself, assess my values and to create a vision for my family. They say hindsight is 20/20 but for me it's crystal clear looking forward. Letting go of the life we have here is brutal, but I'm certain that the life we are headed for will be full of more.

There's a Song for That: "Happy", Leona Lewis

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